When a white person apologizes for having been racially offensive, they often say it wasn’t their intention to do that and they didn’t intend it to come out that way and they had no intention of offending anyone and it wasn’t their intention to upset people.
Why do they go on so much about their intention? I don’t care about their intention. I care about the pain they caused and what they’re going to do about it. I want them to change so that they no longer have that opinion and never hurt anyone like that again.
Let’s say I’m carrying a ladder sideways and I hit someone in the head with it.
“Hey! You just hit me!”
“I did? I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that.”
“Ow! And now I’m bleeding.”
“Seriously, I had no intention of hitting you with that ladder.”
“Yeah, whatever. I think I need a doctor.”
“I mean I did not get up this morning thinking I wanted to whap someone in the head with a ladder. That was absolutely not my intention.”
“I get it. Can you help me?”
“You can be certain that…”
This is what it feels like when white people go on and on about their intention. For some annoying reason, they think it’s the most important thing. Why?
Is it white guilt? Maybe “that was not my intention” is code for, “I feel guilty about this. I really feel guilty about this. Man, do I feel guilty.”
Or are they trying to make sure we know they’re actually a decent person? Maybe they’re saying, “A real piece of shit would have meant that comment to be offensive, but I’m a nice person, so I did not mean that comment to be offensive. I’m nice. I swear I’m nice. Please believe that I’m nice.”
Or are they simply making a distinction between northern racism and southern racism? Maybe they’re saying, “In the south, people actually intend to make blacks and Mexicans uncomfortable, but I’m not that way. I am not a racist whose intention is to antagonize blacks and Mexicans. I am not one of those southern racists.”
I’d like to tell all American white people that they next time they find themselves apologizing for their racial blindspot, they get to refer to their intention once. Just once. Because we don’t care so much about their intention. What’s much more important is what action they’re going to take to fix the problem.