You Might Be Clinically Depressed If

You might be clinically depressed if:

you’re back on cigarettes or junk food or alcohol or shopping or whatever your addiction is that you’ve been trying to kick for decades.
you can’t concentrate on work for more than a few minutes at a time.
the long minutes you spend not doing work increases the feelings of guilt you already had.
blogging seems like a bad idea just a few minutes into a post.
you focus on your most vulnerable areas and pound yourself with criticism.
you’re crying more than usual.
absolutely nothing has happened to make you feel this way.
you don’t want to be alone, so you start texting friends.
you realize you shouldn’t inflict yourself on others, so you stop texting friends.
life, once again, feels too hard and you wonder how you ever saw it any other way.
you envy people going through life-endangering crises because they have a chance to die or at least have their minds absorbed by a bigger and more important disaster than their own failings.
you want to just sleep and sleep.
you regret having caffeine because now you can’t just sleep and sleep.
you need someone to understand this.
it feels like the only people who understand this fall apart when you try to lean on them.
you’ve had your meds, your natural supplements, your herbal tea, your exercise, your meditation and your full night’s sleep and still the heaviness is back.
you dread the long, empty weekend before you.
you’re so tired of being you.